HAD A CHAP COME TO SEE THE MINI COOPER LAST WEEK. HE HAD RANG WITHIN 60 SECONDS OF IT BEING LISTED ON THE WEB SITE, AND WAS SURE TO PURCHASE IT FOR IT IS ONE OF THE BEST EXAMPLES I HAVE SEEN IN MY ENTIRE CAREER. I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN WHEN HE ARRIVED WITH HIS CLIPBOARD THAT IT WOULDN'T BE THAT STRAIGHT FORWARD. HE PROCEEDED TO ENTERTAIN ME BY PAINSTAKINGLY OUTLINING WHAT WAS WRONG WITH THE CAR. MAJOR THINGS SUCH AS THE UPGRADED ENGINE, SPORTIER STEERING WHEEL, WIND UP WINDOWS INSTEAD OF SLIDERS, MODIFIED DASHBOARD. THESE ARE KNOWN AS PERIOD MODIFICATIONS TO LESSER MORTALS AND ARE ENTIRELY ACCEPTABLE IN THE CASE OF THE MINI. WHAT STRUCK ME ABOUT THIS ANORAK WAS THAT HE HAD VERY LITTLE POSITIVE FEEDBACK ON WHAT WAS QUITE OBVIOUSLY A SUPERB EXAMPLE. IT WAS AS IF HE WAS PREPARING US TO ACCEPT A MUCH LOWER OFFER ON THE CAR. I FELT SORRY FOR HIM REALLY BECAUSE HE IS SEARCHING FOR SOMETHING THAT DOES NOT EXIST IN THIS COUNTRY, AN ENTIRELY ORIGINAL 1275S, AND IF IT DOES, ITS EITHER NOT FOR SALE OR MY CUSTOMER WOULD FIND FAULT WITH THE PRICE BEING ASKED. I WAS TEMPTED TO RESPOND THAT I AM ASKING HALF THE PRICE OF AN ENTIRELY ORIGINAL EXAMPLE, BUT IT WOULD HAVE FELL ON DEAF EARS. I SIMPLY PUT IT DOWN TO THE ANORAK SYNDROME. THESE PEOPLE ARE ALWAYS LOOKING FOR THINGS THAT DO NOT EXIST, AND WILL BRAZENLY WALK ONTO THE SHOWROOM FLOOR WEEK IN AND WEEK OUT, FINDING FAULT ON CARS, SPENDING HOURS OF OUR TIME WITH POINTLESS INSPECTIONS. IT GOES WITH THE TERRITORY I GUESS.

SO REMEMBER, THE SALESMAN DOESN'T WANT TO KNOW WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE CAR, HE WANTS TO KNOW WHETHER YOU ARE INTERESTED IN BUYING IT, AND HOW YOU ARE GOING TO PAY FOR IT.